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For the 1995 video Anal Camera 7, he stars as Pfc. Todd Blackburn.
Orlando Bloom stars as Jimmy in the 1992 release Buttman vs. Buttwoman.
In 2000, Orlando Bloom stars as Drew Baylor in the Buttman's Anal Divas.
In 1932, Orlando Bloom plays Himself in the show The All-American.
In 1994, he plays the part of Himself in the video release of Anal Candy Ass.
For the 1992 video Anal Carnival, Shy.
He takes the role of Balian of Ibelin in the 1952 show BBC Sunday Night Theatre: Dial M for Murder.
He takes the role of Legolas Greenleaf in the 2005 feature Annihilation.
Orlando Bloom plays Legolas in the 1999 feature The Annihilation of Fish.
For the 1987 show Afro Erotica 15, Orlando Bloom plays the part of Legolas Greenleaf.
In 1962, he takes the role of Himself/Legolas Greenleaf in the production Balloon Blues.
He takes the role of Himself in the 1999 tv series Balloon Farm.
He stars as Himself/Legolas Greenleaf in the 1998 video Ballroom Dancing Advanced.
In 2004, he plays the part of Joe Byrne in the video release of Assed Out.
Orlando Bloom plays the part of Himself in the 1987 production of Bellman and True.
For the 2000 Buttman's Anal Show, he takes the role of Will Turner.
For the 1952 release of April in Paris, he takes the role of Will Turner.
He is cast in the role of Himself/Legolas Greenleaf in the 1998 release Ballroom Dancing Intermediate.
Orlando Bloom plays Paris in the 1933 movie Aviva.
In 1943, he is cast in the role of Rentboy in the movie Baiate al ward.
He stars as Himself in the 2005 video Anal School 1.
In 1933, he is cast in the role of Himself - Presenter: Film Clip from "The Aviator" in the show The Good Companions.
In 1953, he plays Himself - Co-presenter: Best Film Editing in the movie The Good Beginning.
Orlando Bloom stars as Himself in the 1999 release of Green Fire.
He is cast in the role of Himself in the 1991 video Hot Spot.
Himself in the 1988 release of The Green Flag.
For the 1994 movie Heavenly Creatures, Will Turner.
In 2007, Orlando Bloom is cast in the role of Will Turner in the production of Hatsuyuki no koi: Virgin snow.
Miranda Kerr: Prada Perfection
Showing off her stunning good looks, Miranda Kerr hit the runway for Milan Fashion Week in Milan, Italy on Thursday night (February 25).
The Aussie hottie dazzled as she followed a long line of beautiful models down the catwalk during the course of th
on 2010-02-27 04:49:16
Keira Knightley: Theater Night
Enjoying an evening stroll, Keira Knightley was spotted out and about in London’s West End last night (February 23).
The “Pirates of the Caribbean” babe looked cute and casual as she walked past the paparazzi, sporting a brown coat, m
on 2010-02-24 04:49:33
Orlando makes Ricki-Lee's day
ORLANDO Bloom made Ricki Lee Coulter's day when he called her on Valentine's Day after offering a radio interview as part of a charity drive for Haiti.
on 2010-02-16 04:48:49
Stars on the Set This Week!
Before the holiday of love this weekend the stars got to work across the country. Megan Fox was in costume in LA while Orlando Bloom was in a different kind of outfit on the other side of town. Whitney
on 2010-02-14 04:47:28
Penelope Cruz in Pirates Talks
Penelope Cruz is eyeing a role opposite Johnny Depp in the next PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN movie, according to reports. Keira Knightley, the lead female in the previous three swashbuckling films, quit the franchise in 2008, while Orlando Bloom and Mackenzie
on 2010-02-14 04:46:21
Miranda Kerr -- Legs for Days
Filed under: Paparazzi Photo, Beauty, Hot BodiesHere's supermodel Miranda Kerr in Australia on Thursday, without her lucky ass boyfriend Orlando Bloom.Who wouldn't want to go down under with her?
More Miranda Kerr
Miranda Kerr & Orlando Bloom --
on 2010-02-12 04:49:14
Miranda Kerr's winter looks hot
NO sign of Orlando Bloom at David Jones' 2010 winter show, with Miranda Kerr cheered on by family.
on 2010-02-11 04:48:20
David Jones' winter is hot
THERE was no sign of Orlando Bloom in the audience at David Jones' 2010 winter show, with Miranda Kerr instead cheered on by her family. Video
on 2010-02-11 04:48:30
Orlando Bloom: Stethoscope Stud
Hard at work on the set of “The Good Doctor,” Orlando Bloom was spotted in full wardrobe in Los Angeles on Wednesday (February 10).
Getting into character, the acting stud sported a cute but different hairstyle than usual along with a white
on 2010-02-11 04:50:13
Orlando Bloom: Stethoscope Stud
Hard at work on the set of “The Good Doctor,” Orlando Bloom was spotted in full wardrobe in Los Angeles on Wednesday (February 10).
Getting into character, the acting stud sported a cute but different hairstyle than usual along with a white la
on 2010-02-11 04:50:27
Miranda Kerr's winter looks hot
NO sign of Orlando Bloom at David Jones' 2010 winter show, with Miranda Kerr cheered on by family.
on 2010-02-11 04:48:40
Orlando Bloom lands Doctor role?
Orlando Bloom looks set to play a troubled doctor in a new indie film.
on 2010-02-03 04:50:44
Orlando Bloom is ?The Good Doctor?
Always busy at work, Orlando Bloom was spotted on set for his new movie “The Good Doctor” in Marina Del Rey, California on Tuesday (February 2).
The actor seemed to be pacing while dressed in a grey dress shirt and slacks for the movie R
on 2010-02-03 04:49:51
Orlando Bloom to star in "Good Doctor"
(Reuters)
Reuters - Orlando Bloom will play the lead in "The Good Doctor," an indie drama for which Michael Pena, Troy Garity, Courtney Ford, Taraji P. Henson, Rob Morrow and J.K. Simmons are in negotiations to co-star.
on 2010-02-02 04:45:07
Orlando Bloom to star in "Good Doctor"
(Reuters)
Reuters - Orlando Bloom will play the lead in "The Good Doctor," an indie drama for which Michael Pena, Troy Garity, Courtney Ford, Taraji P. Henson, Rob Morrow and J.K. Simmons are in negotiations to co-star.
on 2010-02-02 04:45:12
Miranda Kerr: Valentine?s Day Vixen
Giving her fans an early Valentine’s Day gift, Miranda Kerr recently posed for a special lingerie edition for Victoria’s Secret.
Like a seasoned pro, the sexy model showed off her gorgeous figure in several shots wearing various pieces of l
on 2010-01-29 04:49:55
Orlando Bloom Sinks Pirates
Orlando Bloom will not return to 'Pirates of the Caribbean' because his character is dead to him.The British actor, who played good guy William Turner in the swashbuckling flick, has no plans to return to the franchise, despite a clamour for his reprisal.
on 2010-01-29 04:49:17
No More Pirates for Bloom
British actor Orlando Bloom has confirmed he has quit the Pirates Of The Caribbean film franchise.The Brit played Will Turner in the first three movies and bosses but hewon't be a part of a planned fourth film, which will start shooting thisspring (10) in
on 2010-01-27 04:49:29
Bloom Wants Hobbit Role
Orlando Bloom is desperate to reprise his role as an elf-prince in upcoming LORD OF THE Rings prequel The Hobbit - he's already asked Peter Jackson for a part in the new movie.
The British actor landed his breakthrough role playing Legolas in Jackson's 20
on 2010-01-27 04:49:35
Miranda Kerr & Orlando Bloom -- Hot & Cold
Filed under: Paparazzi Photo, Beauty, Hot BodiesTMZ.com: While you were at work on Monday, Orlando Bloom chilled at Sundance as his girlfriend Miranda Kerr frolicked in the waters off St. Bart's.Don't feel so bad, it's not like they're gorgeous and rich t
on 2010-01-27 04:50:20
Orlando Bloom: Studly at Sundance
Looking to be enjoying his time in Park City, Orlando Bloom was spotted out and about on Monday (January 25).
The 33-year-old hunky actor happily signed a few autographs as he made his way through the resort town.
Bloom?s latest film ?Sympathy for Delicio
on 2010-01-27 04:50:55
Orlando?s Over Being a Pirate but He?s Still Down to Play an Elf
Orlando Bloom returned to LA yesterday after his trip to Utah for Sundance. He was among the many celebrities who debuted new films, though Buzz wasn’t crazy about his Sympathy For Delicious. Orlando opened up at the festival about another project,
on 2010-01-27 04:51:05
New Kristen at Sundance, Ben on Matt & Jen, & Orlando's Fan Photo Ops
Kristen Stewart has lots to say about Joan Jett and The Runaways at the Sundance Film Festival, while Ben Affleck took a moment to chat about working with Matt Damon again. Meanwhile, Orlando Bloom said hi to his many fans as his girlfriend Miranda Kerr d
on 2010-01-27 04:52:03
Orlando Bloom: Studly at Sundance
Looking to be enjoying his time in Park City, Orlando Bloom was spotted out and about on Monday (January 25).
The 33-year-old hunky actor happily signed a few autographs as he made his way through the resort town.
Bloom’s latest film “Sym
on 2010-01-26 04:52:37
Miranda Kerr: St Barts Bikini Bliss
Continuing on her Caribbean photo shoot, Miranda Kerr was spotted working it on the beach in St. Barts earlier today (January 25).
The Australian stunner looked super-hot as she donned several different getups including a couple of uber-sexy bikinis.
on 2010-01-26 04:52:46
Sundance Rolls On With More Stars!
Sundance 2010 kicked off this weekend and the fun just keeps on rolling. Orlando Bloom and Mark Ruffalo spent some time on the slopes together while Jared Leto brought his brother out to enjoy the fest
on 2010-01-26 04:53:45
Sundance Snapshot: Sympathy For Delicious
I'm still having a blast here at the Sundance Film Festival. The days have been chock full of screenings and celebrity sightings (Ryan Reynolds, Kate Mara, and Josh Radnor, to name a few), and I've been giving you recaps of the films I've been lucky enoug
on 2010-01-26 04:53:48
Miranda Kerr: St Barts Beach Babe
Spending the weekend working in paradise, Miranda Kerr took part in a morning photo shoot in St Barts on Sunday (January 24).
The sexy supermodel donned a variety of comfortable ensembles, strolling along the sandy beach as Victoria’s Secret phot
on 2010-01-25 04:47:53
Hollywood Burglary Gang Suspect Faces New Charge
A suspect linked with high profile raids on the homes of Lindsay Lohan, Rachel Bilson and Orlando Bloom has been charged with receiving stolen property - after wearing a necklace allegedly belonging to the Mean Girls star in court.Nineteen-year-olds Nicho
on 2010-01-22 04:49:05
Orlando Bloom: Parked In By Mark Wahlberg
It?s no secret that parking in Los Angeles can be a nightmare, and Orlando Bloom learned that lesson first-hand last night thanks to Mark Wahlberg.
Bloom, who turns 33 years old today, had driven his Ducati motorcycle to Madeo restaurant in Beverly Hills
on 2010-01-14 04:50:07
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http://www.hollywood.com/news/detail/id/3484162
Johansson Named Top Natural Beauty
By WENN| Tuesday, March 14, 2006
HOLLYWOOD - Actress Scarlett Johansson has been named Hollywood's most
natural beauty by a new survey of make-up artists.
The 21-year-old Match Point star was praised for her luminous skin and
luscious pout.
Titanic star Kate Winslet was second and Catherine Zeta-Jones came in third
in the poll of members of the National Association Of Screen Make-Up Artists
And Hairdressers.
Pirates Of The Caribbean star Orlando Bloom tops the male list with the most
natural good looks, followed by Brokeback Mountain star Jake Gyllenhaal and
Johnny Depp grabbing third place.
Article Copyright World Entertainment News Network All Rights Reserved.
-
Lili2 wrote:
> NY POST..PAGE 6
> getting closer to a wedding date. The couple, who have remained mum on
> whether they're engaged, were recently spotted ring-shopping, and
> Bosworth has brought Bloom home for the holidays. According to
> Perezhilton.com, they were spotted the other day with Bosworth's father
> at the Square Cafe in Bosworth's hometown of Hingham, Mass. The couple
> dated for several years before temporarily breaking up last year
> because of filming and scheduling pressures.
So she took him out to eat with her dad. That doesn't mean anything.
Also, do we really know they were ring shopping? And if so, how do we
know that the ring in question really wasn't a Christman gift?
-
NY POST..PAGE 6
December 26, 2005 -- IT looks like Kate Bosworth and Orlando Bloom are
getting closer to a wedding date. The couple, who have remained mum on
whether they're engaged, were recently spotted ring-shopping, and
Bosworth has brought Bloom home for the holidays. According to
Perezhilton.com, they were spotted the other day with Bosworth's father
at the Square Cafe in Bosworth's hometown of Hingham, Mass. The couple
dated for several years before temporarily breaking up last year
because of filming and scheduling pressures.
-
Bigolhomo wrote in
news:344fq19b4c3cgtsctkgccfcbugl9i0pjm4@4ax.com:
> On 19 Dec 2005 09:44:02 -0800, "Messalina"
> wrote:
...must not go there...must resist scat reference...
> But how will I save the world if I'm on the
> naughty stool?
One BJ at a time?
Big J
-----
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http://www.newsfeeds.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! 120,000+ Newsgroups
----= East and West-Coast Server Farms - Total Privacy via Encryption =----
-
Bigolhomo wrote:
> On 19 Dec 2005 09:44:02 -0800, "Messalina"
> wrote:
> naughty stool?
See, this is why I love you so much.
*kiss*
Mez
-
On 19 Dec 2005 09:44:02 -0800, "Messalina"
wrote:
The naughty stool? But how will I save the world if I'm on the
naughty stool?
--
Bigolhomo
-
On 19 Dec 2005 09:44:02 -0800, "Messalina"
wrote:
The naughty stool? But how will I save the world if I'm on the
naughty stool?
--
Bigolhomo
-
Bigolhomo wrote:
> On Mon, 19 Dec 2005 10:56:43 -0500, "Nancy Young"
> wrote:
> starred Orlando Bloom. I find it hard to believe that she doesn't
> know who he is.
> I'm sure they crossed paths several times during awards season last
> year so why would he suddenly be wanting an autograph now?
Logic? Here? Unacceptable! Go to the naughty stool!
ez
-
On Mon, 19 Dec 2005 10:56:43 -0500, "Nancy Young"
wrote:
>the head, she was on stage, he was in front of it. She said
>something to the effect that Who needs these assholes here.
>Don't quote me, you get the general idea. This was maybe
>15 years ago, maybe more.
>
Annie won an Oscar for writing a song for The Return of the King which
starred Orlando Bloom. I find it hard to believe that she doesn't
know who he is.
I also find it hard to believe that he would ask her for an autograph.
I'm sure they crossed paths several times during awards season last
year so why would he suddenly be wanting an autograph now?
--
Bigolhomo
-
"Rick in Oz" wrote
> On her official website, Annie said the story is "completely untrue",
> adding: "Of course I know who Orlando Bloom is!
> two-minute chat," she said.
> piece
> of nonsense like that?"
Because it's easy to believe from a bitch like her?
Once she kicked a security person at a local concert, I believe in
the head, she was on stage, he was in front of it. She said
something to the effect that Who needs these assholes here.
Don't quote me, you get the general idea. This was maybe
15 years ago, maybe more.
nancy
-
http://breakingnews.iol.ie/entertainment/story.asp?j=224010000&p=zz4xyx95x&n
=224010987
Annie blasts Orlando snub rumours
19/12/2005 - 14:08:16
Annie Lennox has blasted a newspaper report that she mistook Orlando Bloom
for an obsessed fan.
A tabloid report claimed the singer snubbed Bloom at the screening of Woody
Allen's Annie Hall in London after the actor asked her for an autograph.
She allegedly told him: "I just want a quiet night. Please leave me alone
and get a life."
On her official website, Annie said the story is "completely untrue",
adding: "Of course I know who Orlando Bloom is!
"We sat next to each other throughout the film and had a really nice
two-minute chat," she said.
"There's not a shred of truth in any of it. Why would anyone invent a piece
of nonsense like that?"
-
http://www.femalefirst.co.uk/entertainment/118512004.htm
Orlando Bloom And Kate Bosworth Engaged?
December 19, 2005, 6:38:43
Hollywood stars ORLANDO BLOOM and KATE BOSWORTH have sparked rumours they
have become engaged to be married, after perusing London's top jewellers
this weekend (18-19DEC05).
The KINGDOM OF HEAVEN actor, 28, has enjoyed an on/off relationship with the
22-year-old beauty since January 2003, after they met filming an
advertisement for US clothing giant Gap.
An onlooker tells British newspaper The Sun, "They were picking out
engagement rings and she was trying them on. They popped into lots of flash
jewellers on New Bond Street. But they were in Bulgari and Van Cleef &
Arpels for the longest period.
"They had huge smiles on their faces and were kissing and cuddling."
In September (05) Bloom denied engagement rumours but hinted he would soon
be ready for marriage, saying: "None of that stuff is ever true. But that
doesn't mean I don't love someone and that I'm not going to get engaged one
day."
-
http://www.sky.com/showbiz/article/0,,50001-1206028,00.html
Gwyn Tells Orlando A Secret
Rest assured, when it comes to Gwyneth Paltrow, we're still keeping vigilant
on Project Tum Watch.
Latest developments? Rumour has it she's 'fessed up to Orlando Bloom that
she is indeed pregnant.
The latest whispers about Gwyneth's potential baby bump come via the Daily
Mirror, who overheard a natter between Orlando and Gwynnie at this week's
Grand Classics screening in London's Notting Hill.
According to the paper, Gwyn's old chum Orlando was so impressed with the
recent increase in Gwyn's, ahem, chest furniture, that he just had to
congratulate her.
The Mirror's spy claims: "Orlando hasn't seen Gwyneth in a while and he
remarked how big her chest looked.
"She just laughed and said, 'I know they are big. I can't believe it. It's
amazing, isn't it? It's the best thing about being pregnant. I love the way
I look!'"
Later the Golden Globe-nominated yummy mummy to Apple, aged 19 months, was
seen patting her tum and saying: "It's a great feeling and a great time, but
I wish Chris could be here with me now.
"Chris is playing in LA this Wednesday, Thursday and Friday - all the gigs
are sold out, which is great. But I wish I could be with him now."
She later added: "I just don't want him to miss any of this."
Considering Coldplay aren't actually in LA this week (they're playing
sold-out gigs in London) the Mirror's eavesdropping might be a bit
off-klter.
So, should we treat this latest preggers goss as Chinese whispers or gospel
truth?
Keep watching that tum...
-
Ablang wrote:
> Music: The 15th annual Golden Turkey Awards
> By Chris Macias -- Bee Pop Music Critic
> Turkeys in pop music.
All this and Bill O'Reilly, folks! :-D It's gonna ROCK!!!!
> Awards cut. Britney's been on maternity leave, Jessica Simpson didn't
> try to re-release "In This Skin" yet again, and William Hung'>William Hung was smart
> enough to just shut up and not record an album.
> overblown egos, tacky marketing strategies and loony lip-syncing
> adventures. Some were singled out just because they bugged the heck
> out of us.
> start by serving this Turkey with a side of ...
> It's bad enough that Black Eyed Peas are diluting hip-hop into
> something like a Sunny Delight commercial. But the icing on this
> turkey is the group's performance at EndFest back in June. Black Eyed
> Peas was billed as the headliner but eked out only five songs before
> scrambling from Raley Field. Rightfully so, the fans turned sour and
> booed when they didn't get a full serving of these Peas.
> are responsible for the most irritating song of 2005: "My Humps." It's
> like Kelis' "Milkshake" gone rancid, a come-hither kind of tune that
> drills into your brain like the Ceti eels from "Star Trek II: The
> Wrath of Khan."
> my humps, my humps."
> The EndFest crowd also turned nasty, like a sea of Simon Cowells, when
> Corey Clark'>Corey Clark took the stage. It was bad enough that the disgraced
> "American Idol" finalist performed the kind of generic R&B act that
> made J.Lo look like a musical genius. But Clark had been trying to
> promote his solo album by claiming he'd had an affair with "American
> Idol" judge Paula Abdul. Nobody really cared if Clark was Abdul's boy
> toy, and it took the general public about two seconds to see through
> this desperate marketing tactic.
> Here was the first mega-concert of the 21st century, a
> transcontinental gathering of pop star royalty that included Paul
> McCartney, U2, Green Day and oodles of other bands trying to raise
> awareness about African poverty.
> focusing on the music at hand, such as the Pink Floyd reunion or U2's
> stellar version of "One," all us couch potatoes were mostly served
> abbreviated performances and maximum gushing by dorky VJs about how
> historic Live 8 was.
> books for how weak a concert broadcast could be. It was more like
> watching eMpTV.
> Some musicians, like Neil Young and U2, come complete with bridging
> music and politics. But too much of this do-gooder business smells
> more like a marketing opportunity than of a chance to righteously rock
> out.
> that the Western world is losing the fight against skirt hemlines.
> When did Rob Thomas become the face of African poverty? And hey, I
> love Snoop Dogg and all, but what was he doing at Live 8? Snoop Dizzle
> is the last guy I'd want to change the world.
> Not only does R. Kelly'>R. Kelly get a spot on the Golden Turkey list, but he
> also receives our first "Ashlee Simpson" Award for worst lip-synching.
> The R&B singer didn't even try to fake his canned vocals while
> performing at MTV's Video Music Awards in August. Shoot, he didn't
> have a microphone for a chunk of the time. But that didn't stop him
> from pantomiming like a man possessed while he "sang" from his weird
> soap opera of an album, "Trapped in the Closet."
> have acid reflux to blame.
> This one kind of hurts because Interpol makes some of the best
> brooding rock you'll hear this side of Joy Division. Band members are
> tragic, they're romantic, they dress cool, like vampires after an
> Esquire magazine makeover. But live, Interpol's just a plain downer.
> They stood. They stood some more. Then they completely buffed the
> introduction to "Public Pervert," one of the best songs from the
> "Antics" album.
> too-cool-for-school stage presence just isn't cutting it, especially
> for those who plunked down part of their paycheck for a ticket. Take
> some time to rehearse, turkeys.
> The frontman for industrial-rockers Nine Inch Nails is obviously a
> tortured guy. Anyone who writes a song like "Hurt" or "Head Like a
> Hole" could certainly use a hug and a hot bowl of soup. But there's a
> difference between being a sensitive artiste and a straight-up
> crybaby.
> whined in his online tour journal that Sacramento was a listless bunch
> and he couldn't wait to get out of town. Guess he didn't notice all
> the Nine Inch Nails fans grinding around Arco in their black corsets
> and fishnet tights. Nine Inch Nails simply rocked that night - at
> least to everyone except Reznor.
> empty seats. Arco Arena was only about half full (or half empty, as
> Reznor would see it). But after unfairly dissing Sacramento, there
> will probably be even more empty seats the next time around.
> This social networking site is also a popular go-to place for bands.
> It's an online spot where you can learn more about a group, and maybe
> sample some tunes and get in touch with like-minded fans.
> bandwidth? After the zillion "friends" a band's added - and it's
> anyone's guess of how many they know IRL (in.real.life) - plus emedded
> music and way too many animated pictures, it's the recipe for a
> computer crash.
> your MySpace page like a multimedia turkey.
> This spot was reserved for J.Lo when her "Rebirth" album came out in
> March. Because whenever J. Lo releases one of those vanity projects
> disguised as music, we can't help but smell Turkey.
> her vocal range as there are letters in her nickname. And that's
> something that can't be masked by the best producers her J.Lo empire
> can hire, or whatever Pro Tools trickery is gooped on her voice. If
> "Rebirth" has any message, it's this: Homegirl still can't sing.
> We finish this list with a pop music concept that is thoroughly done:
> "American Idol." This TV talent show debuted as a fun bit of musical
> Darwinism, a survival-of-the-fittest singing competition with stardom
> as the grand prize. The whole shebang - or "She Bangs," as William
> Hung would say - is just played out and predictable after four
> seasons. Enough of the power ballads, the faux-fighting between judges
> Paula Abdul and Simon Cowell, and the endless product placement for
> Coca-Cola and Ford Focus. After the same ol' same ol', it's time to
> give "American Idol" a serious makeover, or put a fork in this turkey.
> By Rick Kushman -- Bee TV Columnist
> a couple of years back and gave him a lifetime achievement drumstick.
> But he was so Geraldo Rivera-ish this year, it's tempting to give him
> just onemore Turkey.
> beat up a New York Times critic if she were male - showing he's both a
> bully and a sexist - and his return to daytime sleaze with a show that
> used Mark Fuhrman of O.J. Simpson-trial fame as a correspondent.
> pretty big year for our top Turkey recipient, who is ...
> Two TV moments that capture everything about the Martha Stewart'>Martha Stewart charm:
> First: When Stewart was released from prison in March, she was touring
> her estate. Reporters shouted the question, What did she miss most?
> quickly, her family and friends. Missed them, too.
> Stewart," we saw our heroine walking through her offices, cheerfully
> saying hi to everyone, patting workers on their shoulders, and gently
> correcting a document handed her by an employee - who, frankly, looked
> frightened being that close. It was Martha Congeniality.
> or not, we know Martha Stewart'>Martha Stewart - severe, unyielding, perpetually
> ticked off at her salad. If she was going to run herd on a bunch of
> wannabes in "The Apprentice," we wanted the real Martha doing it. No
> wonder there will be no second round of "The Apprentice: Martha
> Stewart." And for my money, instead of that namby-pamby good luck
> letter she writes the fired contestants, she should give them all a
> lemon.
> Remember how news was supposed to cover, you know, news? Not if you're
> "Primetime Live." It had John Quinones give PR support to former
> "American Idol" loser Corey Clark'>Corey Clark and his "complaint" that he had an
> affair with Paula Abdul.
> Idol," not Congress.
> delivered lines that included, I swear, "He didn't even have a cell
> phone." Ohmygawd, poor Corey, no wonder he let that hussy use him.
> it, and, by the way, he had an album coming out. We even heard a song
> from it. He still couldn't sing.
> It's like the new Coke. There are traces of the old formula, but this
> one is awful.
> cable channels in 200-plus media markets was impossibly expensive. But
> a fanzine? That was the response? America does not need another
> downscale, celebrity-obsessed magazine.
> and critic Matt Roush, but they are buried. And instead of using the
> larger format for more critiques or recommendations, it's filled with
> cheap star photos. TV Guide used to be a classy little fixture in our
> lives. Now it's willfully tacky.
> It's not always easy bestowing Turkeys. I'm not happy about this one.
> Matt LeBlanc is a genuinely good guy, and, for my money, he was the
> funniest Friend.
> This is not a Turkey to all the cheesy TV movies out there. There is a
> place for a "Vampire Bats" or even a "Spring Break Shark Attack."
> figured there just weren't enough disasters in the world. This wasn't
> just a lame TV flick, it was an act of insensitivity. Plus the movie
> was terrible.
> storm attack on Paris. Amid all the chaos, one public-service-minded
> storm cell smacked around a mime.
> She's one of the most distasteful, if lightweight, people trouping up
> and down red carpets these days - she even trademarked her name - and
> she's done exactly nothing to earn her success except to repeatedly
> convince us she's a bad person. But she rose to a special level of
> reprehensible earlier this month.
> had done little to warrant her fame, she attacked back saying Ice-T
> "sold out" by playing a cop on "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit."
> Apparently in Omarosa's world, playing a jerk is good, playing a law
> enforcement officer is not.
> Here's a bad idea badly executed. ESPN created a show about sports
> celebrity in classic "Entertainment Tonight"-style, which is to say
> empty, insipid and delivered in vapid, hyperventilating tones. All the
> while hosts Mario Lopez and Thea Andrews never lose their frozen
> beauty-contestant smiles.
> it's really the intersection of insignificant and inane. Does anyone
> need to know that Shaquille O'Neal shot a commercial or Serena
> Williams bought a dress?
> and Lance Armstrong are still engaged." And Francisco Franco is still
> dead.
> Every season, the networks give us one gift by making a horrible show
> and giving it the perfect name. We give you this year's entry.
> lasted two episodes. Possibly the worst idea for a TV show in a
> decade.
> Accepting for all the lawyers turned legal analysts - Greta Van
> Susteren is another who comes to mind - who gleefully turn other
> people's misery into their chance for self-promotion. And Grace is the
> most shrill and merciless by a lot.
> set out convicting people left and right without the inconvenience of
> a trial.
> anyone who might suggest we follow the Constitution.
> ought to be ashamed she works for the company, let alone has her own
> show.
> The company's not selling burgers, it's campaigning for incivility and
> crassness.The worst thing about the Paris Hilton'>Paris Hilton car wash ad - besides
> having Paris Hilton'>Paris Hilton in it - was it made us forget how sleazy and
> coarse all the other Carl's Jr. ads are. This is a company that
> professes to be fighting the moral decline in America. Except,
> apparently, when being shameless is good for Carl's Jr.'s business.
> By Carla Meyer -- Bee Movie Critic
> That's just not true. It's only about half of the time.
> average fan. This is one of those times.
> the film world for 2005. One recipient used to be my favorite
> director, another my favorite actress and another ... well, he starred
> in two of my ex-favorite director's films and was married to an
> actress who has never been my favorite but is very talented.
> as reminders to give thanks that we are in the midst of a season in
> which most films are of decent quality. The lackluster movies of
> previous months told a far different story - and contributed heavily
> to our list.
> Jolie used to deliver raw, unexpected performances of an emotional
> acuity more breathtaking than even her beauty. But she's smoothed her
> screen persona so well that it's nearly stone. "Smith," the
> bullet-filled alleged comedy pairing her and Brad Pitt, was
> overstuffed in every way, yet Pitt was as likable as ever in it.
> poses instead of emoting. For the past few years, Jolie has become
> more icon than actress, with her personal life and charitable work
> eclipsing her screen talent to a great, almost Elizabeth Taylor-like
> degree.
> Crowe demonstrated a keen eye and ear for human behavior in "Fast
> Times at Ridgemont High," "Say Anything" and "Jerry Maguire." He also
> exhibited a knack for inserting heartfelt speeches and pop songs to
> render this recognizable human behavior more romantic or poignant.
> "Almost Famous" and "Vanilla Sky" stretched the limits until he busted
> them with "Elizabethtown," in which he hammered the sentimentality and
> pop music until too many notes seemed false. He also saddled poor ...
> ... with the nearly impossible task of playing a guy simultaneously
> contemplating suicide, mourning his father's death and falling in
> love. I say "nearly impossible" because John Cusack could have made it
> work. But Bloom's post-"Lord of the Rings" career has proved that
> thousands of screaming girls can be wrong. Despite some seriously
> dreamy brown eyes and a curious, interested manner, Bloom has yet to
> exude the kind of screen charisma to warrant his star billing in
> big-budget pictures. He lacked the physical heft to pull off his
> warrior character in "Kingdom of Heaven," just as he lacked the
> emotional gravity for the blindly lovestruck Paris in last year's
> "Troy."
> The lack of a Pixar film in 2005 was sorely felt, since "Chicken
> Little," "Valiant" and "Madagascar" failed to approach the visual
> dazzle of "The Incredibles" or "Finding Nemo." The vividly rendered
> "Robots" offered a bright spot, but for the most part, newfangled
> computer artistry failed to capture the imagination the way more
> rudimentary animation did in "Tim Burton's Corpse Bride" and "Wallace
> & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit."
> Complaining about trickery by national gossip magazines is like
> complaining that one is dehydrated despite having quaffed eight
> glasses of wine the night before. You should know what you're getting.
> But 2005 brought too many shots of rumored real-life couples in
> clinches that actually were being performed for movie cameras, with
> the true circumstances of the photos revealed in tiny print beneath
> giant headlines blaring the couple's togetherness.
> sure that, thanks to the tabloids, I now know the ending to the Vince
> Vaughn-Jennifer Aniston movie "The Break Up." An obvious solution
> would be to stop reading these magazines. But that's a sacrifice some
> of us are unwilling to make.
> Label-mania spun out of control this year, most notably in "Herbie:
> Fully Loaded," practically a billboard for a particular brand of
> cheese puff - and about 1,000 other products. The lengths to which
> companies go to try to incorporate products into story lines also
> reached a low, with a fast-food chain promoting its burgers by having
> a convict in "The Longest Yard" hide one in his pants. When a Marine
> is forced to drink water until he gets sick in "Jarhead," the label on
> the sick-making water is oddly prominent.
> Always the hardest genre to get right, romantic-comedy offerings
> seemed especially anemic this year, with broad comedies ("The Wedding
> Crashers," "The 40-Year-Old Virgin") outshining their lovestruck
> cousins. "Fever Pitch," "Bewitched," "Must Love Dogs" and "Just Like
> Heaven" missed the mark by assuming that casting appealing leads would
> be enough to sustain a picture.
> comedies, mostly went missing, especially in the execrable ...
> ... which locked up a 2005 Turkey in record speed upon its release in
> early February. A pastiche of films from "Pretty Woman" to "My Best
> Friend's Wedding," it follows a woman (Debra Messing) who hires a male
> escort (Dermot Mulroney) to accompany her to her sister's wedding in
> England. Their ensuing romance is beyond implausible, the film's jokes
> are lame and the picture so visually enervated that its stars look
> borderline unattractive at times.
> The perfect storm of bad elements, from the casting of a remarkably
> stiff Hilary Duff to its premise, this picture would be neck and neck
> with "Wedding Date" for worst romantic comedy of 2005 had it not
> technically disqualified itself by offering as its romantic duo a
> mother and daughter. Or at least they are a romantic duo in
> cyberspace, where Duff's character, a seriously troubled teen who's
> supposed to be plucky, woos her mom in the guise of being a secret
> admirer. Mom's no winner either, since she uproots her two daughters
> to a new town every time things head south with a man. Unsettling.
> His Katie-touting, psychiatry-bashing trip through the talk-show
> circuit did the previously unthinkable: It made you wish that a big
> movie star would drone on about the film he was promoting (remember
> it? "War of the Worlds") instead of about personal issues.
> "It takes one to know one."
> -- Unknown
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Music: The 15th annual Golden Turkey Awards
By Chris Macias -- Bee Pop Music Critic
What's that "gobble gobble" sound? Ah, it's time to roast this year's
Turkeys in pop music.
Some of the usual suspects didn't make this year's Golden Turkey
Awards cut. Britney's been on maternity leave, Jessica Simpson didn't
try to re-release "In This Skin" yet again, and William Hung'>William Hung was smart
enough to just shut up and not record an album.
But there's plenty of bird to go around: 2005 was stuffed with
overblown egos, tacky marketing strategies and loony lip-syncing
adventures. Some were singled out just because they bugged the heck
out of us.
So it's time to cue up some tunes and pluck these suckers. And we'll
start by serving this Turkey with a side of ...
1. Black Eyed Peas
It's bad enough that Black Eyed Peas are diluting hip-hop into
something like a Sunny Delight commercial. But the icing on this
turkey is the group's performance at EndFest back in June. Black Eyed
Peas was billed as the headliner but eked out only five songs before
scrambling from Raley Field. Rightfully so, the fans turned sour and
booed when they didn't get a full serving of these Peas.
And hands down - or, make that turkey legs down - Black Eyed Peas also
are responsible for the most irritating song of 2005: "My Humps." It's
like Kelis' "Milkshake" gone rancid, a come-hither kind of tune that
drills into your brain like the Ceti eels from "Star Trek II: The
Wrath of Khan."
"My humps, my humps, my humps, my humps/My lovely lady lumps/My humps,
my humps, my humps."
Agh, there it goes again!
2. Corey Clark
The EndFest crowd also turned nasty, like a sea of Simon Cowells, when
Corey Clark took the stage. It was bad enough that the disgraced
"American Idol" finalist performed the kind of generic R&B act that
made J.Lo look like a musical genius. But Clark had been trying to
promote his solo album by claiming he'd had an affair with "American
Idol" judge Paula Abdul. Nobody really cared if Clark was Abdul's boy
toy, and it took the general public about two seconds to see through
this desperate marketing tactic.
At least William Hung'>William Hung wasn't sleazy.
3. MTV's Live 8 coverage
Here was the first mega-concert of the 21st century, a
transcontinental gathering of pop star royalty that included Paul
McCartney, U2, Green Day and oodles of other bands trying to raise
awareness about African poverty.
But MTV's broadcast of Live 8 was a total buzz kill. Instead of
focusing on the music at hand, such as the Pink Floyd reunion or U2's
stellar version of "One," all us couch potatoes were mostly served
abbreviated performances and maximum gushing by dorky VJs about how
historic Live 8 was.
The concerts were historic all right - it'll go down in the record
books for how weak a concert broadcast could be. It was more like
watching eMpTV.
4. Dubiously do-gooder pop stars:
Some musicians, like Neil Young and U2, come complete with bridging
music and politics. But too much of this do-gooder business smells
more like a marketing opportunity than of a chance to righteously rock
out.
The only message you'd get from Mariah Carey's Live 8 performance was
that the Western world is losing the fight against skirt hemlines.
When did Rob Thomas become the face of African poverty? And hey, I
love Snoop Dogg and all, but what was he doing at Live 8? Snoop Dizzle
is the last guy I'd want to change the world.
Maybe its time for a new benefit concert: Rescue the Egos.
5. R. Kelly
Not only does R. Kelly get a spot on the Golden Turkey list, but he
also receives our first "Ashlee Simpson" Award for worst lip-synching.
The R&B singer didn't even try to fake his canned vocals while
performing at MTV's Video Music Awards in August. Shoot, he didn't
have a microphone for a chunk of the time. But that didn't stop him
from pantomiming like a man possessed while he "sang" from his weird
soap opera of an album, "Trapped in the Closet."
R. Kelly basically came off like a complete kook. And he didn't even
have acid reflux to blame.
6. Interpol
This one kind of hurts because Interpol makes some of the best
brooding rock you'll hear this side of Joy Division. Band members are
tragic, they're romantic, they dress cool, like vampires after an
Esquire magazine makeover. But live, Interpol's just a plain downer.
Here's how the show went down at UC Davis' Freeborn Hall in September:
They stood. They stood some more. Then they completely buffed the
introduction to "Public Pervert," one of the best songs from the
"Antics" album.
Having to restart a song is a total rookie maneuver. And this
too-cool-for-school stage presence just isn't cutting it, especially
for those who plunked down part of their paycheck for a ticket. Take
some time to rehearse, turkeys.
7. Trent Reznor
The frontman for industrial-rockers Nine Inch Nails is obviously a
tortured guy. Anyone who writes a song like "Hurt" or "Head Like a
Hole" could certainly use a hug and a hot bowl of soup. But there's a
difference between being a sensitive artiste and a straight-up
crybaby.
After Nine Inch Nails performed at Arco Arena in September, Reznor
whined in his online tour journal that Sacramento was a listless bunch
and he couldn't wait to get out of town. Guess he didn't notice all
the Nine Inch Nails fans grinding around Arco in their black corsets
and fishnet tights. Nine Inch Nails simply rocked that night - at
least to everyone except Reznor.
Mr. Nine Inch Nails was probably just bummed that there were so many
empty seats. Arco Arena was only about half full (or half empty, as
Reznor would see it). But after unfairly dissing Sacramento, there
will probably be even more empty seats the next time around.
8. Most band pages on MySpace.com
This social networking site is also a popular go-to place for bands.
It's an online spot where you can learn more about a group, and maybe
sample some tunes and get in touch with like-minded fans.
But can a band build a MySpace page without sucking up some serious
bandwidth? After the zillion "friends" a band's added - and it's
anyone's guess of how many they know IRL (in.real.life) - plus emedded
music and way too many animated pictures, it's the recipe for a
computer crash.
Here's a tip: Spend some more time on your songs instead of stuffing
your MySpace page like a multimedia turkey.
9. Jennifer Lopez
This spot was reserved for J.Lo when her "Rebirth" album came out in
March. Because whenever J. Lo releases one of those vanity projects
disguised as music, we can't help but smell Turkey.
Listen to "Rebirth" and you'll hear that J.Lo's got as many notes in
her vocal range as there are letters in her nickname. And that's
something that can't be masked by the best producers her J.Lo empire
can hire, or whatever Pro Tools trickery is gooped on her voice. If
"Rebirth" has any message, it's this: Homegirl still can't sing.
10. 'American Idol'
We finish this list with a pop music concept that is thoroughly done:
"American Idol." This TV talent show debuted as a fun bit of musical
Darwinism, a survival-of-the-fittest singing competition with stardom
as the grand prize. The whole shebang - or "She Bangs," as William
Hung would say - is just played out and predictable after four
seasons. Enough of the power ballads, the faux-fighting between judges
Paula Abdul and Simon Cowell, and the endless product placement for
Coca-Cola and Ford Focus. After the same ol' same ol', it's time to
give "American Idol" a serious makeover, or put a fork in this turkey.
http://www.sacticket.com/music/story/13874996p-14714204c.html
--
Television: The 15th annual Golden Turkey Awards
By Rick Kushman -- Bee TV Columnist
This year was tough here at Turkey Central. We retired Geraldo Rivera
a couple of years back and gave him a lifetime achievement drumstick.
But he was so Geraldo Rivera-ish this year, it's tempting to give him
just onemore Turkey.
There was his "rescue work" during Hurricane Katrina, his threat to
beat up a New York Times critic if she were male - showing he's both a
bully and a sexist - and his return to daytime sleaze with a show that
used Mark Fuhrman of O.J. Simpson-trial fame as a correspondent.
Still, we retired his number. We have to move on. Besides, this was a
pretty big year for our top Turkey recipient, who is ...
1. Martha Stewart'>Martha Stewart
Two TV moments that capture everything about the Martha Stewart'>Martha Stewart charm:
First: When Stewart was released from prison in March, she was touring
her estate. Reporters shouted the question, What did she miss most?
"I really missed lemons," she said. Pause. Quiet. And, she added
quickly, her family and friends. Missed them, too.
Second: In the opening scenes of NBC's "The Apprentice: Martha
Stewart," we saw our heroine walking through her offices, cheerfully
saying hi to everyone, patting workers on their shoulders, and gently
correcting a document handed her by an employee - who, frankly, looked
frightened being that close. It was Martha Congeniality.
Except, no, not for a minute do we buy this new character. Prison time
or not, we know Martha Stewart'>Martha Stewart - severe, unyielding, perpetually
ticked off at her salad. If she was going to run herd on a bunch of
wannabes in "The Apprentice," we wanted the real Martha doing it. No
wonder there will be no second round of "The Apprentice: Martha
Stewart." And for my money, instead of that namby-pamby good luck
letter she writes the fired contestants, she should give them all a
lemon.
2. ABC News, for 'Fallen Idol'
Remember how news was supposed to cover, you know, news? Not if you're
"Primetime Live." It had John Quinones give PR support to former
"American Idol" loser Corey Clark and his "complaint" that he had an
affair with Paula Abdul.
Where do we even start? Maybe with this: So what? It's "American
Idol," not Congress.
Quinones treated it like he discovered leaks in national security and
delivered lines that included, I swear, "He didn't even have a cell
phone." Ohmygawd, poor Corey, no wonder he let that hussy use him.
Clark, ever the gentleman, said he just wanted the world to know about
it, and, by the way, he had an album coming out. We even heard a song
from it. He still couldn't sing.
3. TV Guide
It's like the new Coke. There are traces of the old formula, but this
one is awful.
We understand the problem. Trying to list everything, all 2-gazillion
cable channels in 200-plus media markets was impossibly expensive. But
a fanzine? That was the response? America does not need another
downscale, celebrity-obsessed magazine.
The new magazine still has some good features like Cheers and Jeers
and critic Matt Roush, but they are buried. And instead of using the
larger format for more critiques or recommendations, it's filled with
cheap star photos. TV Guide used to be a classy little fixture in our
lives. Now it's willfully tacky.
4. NBC's 'Joey'
It's not always easy bestowing Turkeys. I'm not happy about this one.
Matt LeBlanc is a genuinely good guy, and, for my money, he was the
funniest Friend.
On the other hand, have you seen "Joey"? Good lord.
5. CBS' 'Category 7: The End of the World'
This is not a Turkey to all the cheesy TV movies out there. There is a
place for a "Vampire Bats" or even a "Spring Break Shark Attack."
But America did not need a hurricane movie. Not this year. Guess CBS
figured there just weren't enough disasters in the world. This wasn't
just a lame TV flick, it was an act of insensitivity. Plus the movie
was terrible.
Having said that, there was one small good moment. That was during the
storm attack on Paris. Amid all the chaos, one public-service-minded
storm cell smacked around a mime.
6. Omarosa
She's one of the most distasteful, if lightweight, people trouping up
and down red carpets these days - she even trademarked her name - and
she's done exactly nothing to earn her success except to repeatedly
convince us she's a bad person. But she rose to a special level of
reprehensible earlier this month.
After rapper and actor Ice-T mentioned that very point that Omarosa
had done little to warrant her fame, she attacked back saying Ice-T
"sold out" by playing a cop on "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit."
Apparently in Omarosa's world, playing a jerk is good, playing a law
enforcement officer is not.
7. 'ESPN Hollywood'
Here's a bad idea badly executed. ESPN created a show about sports
celebrity in classic "Entertainment Tonight"-style, which is to say
empty, insipid and delivered in vapid, hyperventilating tones. All the
while hosts Mario Lopez and Thea Andrews never lose their frozen
beauty-contestant smiles.
ESPN says it covers the intersection of sports and entertainment, but
it's really the intersection of insignificant and inane. Does anyone
need to know that Shaquille O'Neal shot a commercial or Serena
Williams bought a dress?
This was a recent "scoop": "From New York comes word that Sheryl Crow
and Lance Armstrong are still engaged." And Francisco Franco is still
dead.
8. NBC's 'Inconceivable'
Every season, the networks give us one gift by making a horrible show
and giving it the perfect name. We give you this year's entry.
This was supposed to be a sexy soap based at a fertility clinic. It
lasted two episodes. Possibly the worst idea for a TV show in a
decade.
9. Nancy Grace
Accepting for all the lawyers turned legal analysts - Greta Van
Susteren is another who comes to mind - who gleefully turn other
people's misery into their chance for self-promotion. And Grace is the
most shrill and merciless by a lot.
She got her own show on CNN Headline News this spring, and promptly
set out convicting people left and right without the inconvenience of
a trial.
She also doesn't mind grilling witnesses and victims, and berating
anyone who might suggest we follow the Constitution.
Grace is a one-woman mob looking to string up someone, anyone, and CNN
ought to be ashamed she works for the company, let alone has her own
show.
10. Carl's Jr.
The company's not selling burgers, it's campaigning for incivility and
crassness.The worst thing about the Paris Hilton'>Paris Hilton car wash ad - besides
having Paris Hilton'>Paris Hilton in it - was it made us forget how sleazy and
coarse all the other Carl's Jr. ads are. This is a company that
professes to be fighting the moral decline in America. Except,
apparently, when being shameless is good for Carl's Jr.'s business.
http://www.sacticket.com/tv_radio/story/13874890p-14714169c.html
--
Movies: The 15th annual Golden Turkey Awards
By Carla Meyer -- Bee Movie Critic
People think film critics want to cut people down all the time.
That's just not true. It's only about half of the time.
The other times pain us, since we love movies as much or more than the
average fan. This is one of those times.
It is with a heavy heart that I list the Golden Turkey recipients from
the film world for 2005. One recipient used to be my favorite
director, another my favorite actress and another ... well, he starred
in two of my ex-favorite director's films and was married to an
actress who has never been my favorite but is very talented.
Perhaps it's best to think of the Turkeys not as criticism at all, but
as reminders to give thanks that we are in the midst of a season in
which most films are of decent quality. The lackluster movies of
previous months told a far different story - and contributed heavily
to our list.
1. Angelina Jolie in 'Mr. and Mrs. Smith'
Jolie used to deliver raw, unexpected performances of an emotional
acuity more breathtaking than even her beauty. But she's smoothed her
screen persona so well that it's nearly stone. "Smith," the
bullet-filled alleged comedy pairing her and Brad Pitt, was
overstuffed in every way, yet Pitt was as likable as ever in it.
Jolie, by contrast, seemed humorless and haughty, enacting a series of
poses instead of emoting. For the past few years, Jolie has become
more icon than actress, with her personal life and charitable work
eclipsing her screen talent to a great, almost Elizabeth Taylor-like
degree.
2. Cameron Crowe
Crowe demonstrated a keen eye and ear for human behavior in "Fast
Times at Ridgemont High," "Say Anything" and "Jerry Maguire." He also
exhibited a knack for inserting heartfelt speeches and pop songs to
render this recognizable human behavior more romantic or poignant.
"Almost Famous" and "Vanilla Sky" stretched the limits until he busted
them with "Elizabethtown," in which he hammered the sentimentality and
pop music until too many notes seemed false. He also saddled poor ...
3. Orlando Bloom ...
... with the nearly impossible task of playing a guy simultaneously
contemplating suicide, mourning his father's death and falling in
love. I say "nearly impossible" because John Cusack could have made it
work. But Bloom's post-"Lord of the Rings" career has proved that
thousands of screaming girls can be wrong. Despite some seriously
dreamy brown eyes and a curious, interested manner, Bloom has yet to
exude the kind of screen charisma to warrant his star billing in
big-budget pictures. He lacked the physical heft to pull off his
warrior character in "Kingdom of Heaven," just as he lacked the
emotional gravity for the blindly lovestruck Paris in last year's
"Troy."
4. Computer animation
The lack of a Pixar film in 2005 was sorely felt, since "Chicken
Little," "Valiant" and "Madagascar" failed to approach the visual
dazzle of "The Incredibles" or "Finding Nemo." The vividly rendered
"Robots" offered a bright spot, but for the most part, newfangled
computer artistry failed to capture the imagination the way more
rudimentary animation did in "Tim Burton's Corpse Bride" and "Wallace
& Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit."
5. Paparazzi on movie locations
Complaining about trickery by national gossip magazines is like
complaining that one is dehydrated despite having quaffed eight
glasses of wine the night before. You should know what you're getting.
But 2005 brought too many shots of rumored real-life couples in
clinches that actually were being performed for movie cameras, with
the true circumstances of the photos revealed in tiny print beneath
giant headlines blaring the couple's togetherness.
Sometimes these on-set photos even gave away plot points. I'm pretty
sure that, thanks to the tabloids, I now know the ending to the Vince
Vaughn-Jennifer Aniston movie "The Break Up." An obvious solution
would be to stop reading these magazines. But that's a sacrifice some
of us are unwilling to make.
6. Product placements
Label-mania spun out of control this year, most notably in "Herbie:
Fully Loaded," practically a billboard for a particular brand of
cheese puff - and about 1,000 other products. The lengths to which
companies go to try to incorporate products into story lines also
reached a low, with a fast-food chain promoting its burgers by having
a convict in "The Longest Yard" hide one in his pants. When a Marine
is forced to drink water until he gets sick in "Jarhead," the label on
the sick-making water is oddly prominent.
7. Romantic comedies
Always the hardest genre to get right, romantic-comedy offerings
seemed especially anemic this year, with broad comedies ("The Wedding
Crashers," "The 40-Year-Old Virgin") outshining their lovestruck
cousins. "Fever Pitch," "Bewitched," "Must Love Dogs" and "Just Like
Heaven" missed the mark by assuming that casting appealing leads would
be enough to sustain a picture.
Zippy repartee and sexual tension, those hallmarks of great romantic
comedies, mostly went missing, especially in the execrable ...
8. 'The Wedding Date' ...
... which locked up a 2005 Turkey in record speed upon its release in
early February. A pastiche of films from "Pretty Woman" to "My Best
Friend's Wedding," it follows a woman (Debra Messing) who hires a male
escort (Dermot Mulroney) to accompany her to her sister's wedding in
England. Their ensuing romance is beyond implausible, the film's jokes
are lame and the picture so visually enervated that its stars look
borderline unattractive at times.
9. 'The Perfect Man'
The perfect storm of bad elements, from the casting of a remarkably
stiff Hilary Duff to its premise, this picture would be neck and neck
with "Wedding Date" for worst romantic comedy of 2005 had it not
technically disqualified itself by offering as its romantic duo a
mother and daughter. Or at least they are a romantic duo in
cyberspace, where Duff's character, a seriously troubled teen who's
supposed to be plucky, woos her mom in the guise of being a secret
admirer. Mom's no winner either, since she uproots her two daughters
to a new town every time things head south with a man. Unsettling.
10. Tom Cruise
His Katie-touting, psychiatry-bashing trip through the talk-show
circuit did the previously unthinkable: It made you wish that a big
movie star would drone on about the film he was promoting (remember
it? "War of the Worlds") instead of about personal issues.
http://www.sacticket.com/calendar/story/13874932p-14714164c.html
===
"It takes one to know one."
-- Unknown
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http://breakingnews.iol.ie/entertainment/story.asp?j=162917266&p=y6z9y797z
McConaughey named sexiest man alive
17/11/2005 - 18:19:51
Actor Matthew McConaughey has been named the Sexiest Man Alive by
top-selling People magazine in the United States.
The Sahara star's credentials include being chivalrous and passionate while
he also apparently "cooks a mean marinara".
"I like the 'Alive' part," he said of his new title.
"Now I've made it. Wait until you see the roles I could take after this. You
're going to see my gut hanging over, plus 22lbs. It'll be a whole new kind
of sexy!"
The honour caps a 20-year tradition that has seen some of the world's most
beautiful men take home the crown.
Previous winners include Dirty Dancing heartthrob Patrick Swayze, former 007
Pierce Brosnan and last year's golden boy Jude Law.
George Clooney won the accolade in 1999 and admitted he was not too happy
when his friend Brad Pitt snatched it back the following year.
"Pretty boy Pitt took me off (in 2000) and I'm a little angry about that,"
he joked. "He's a two-timer. He's gotten it twice."
Cover star McConaughey, 36, admitted that he has not worn deodorant in 20
years and prefers to sleep naked.
His worst habit is "nicotine" and his biggest turn on? "Grace. When a woman
is graceful, you can tell by the way she moves," he said.
On a perfect night with girlfriend, actress Penelope Cruz, McConaughey
revealed: "We get online or talk about some place we dream of travelling
somewhere."
Actors biting at McConaughey's heels on the 2005 list include Jake
Gyllenhaal, Vince Vaughn, Orlando Bloom and Matt Damon.
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http://www.13wham.com/entertainment/story.aspx?content_id=1C9B1D7D-0D9C-4F10
-BC93-EE1025AD32D3
Orlando Bloom Sued by Former Managers
British movie hunk Orlando Bloom is being sued by the bosses of his former
management company over claims he still owes them for securing high-profile
film roles for him.
The executives at Hollywood company The Firm are asking for $600,000 in
unpaid commissions from the actor after allegedly helping him land leading
roles in 'Elizabethtown,' 'Kingdom of Heaven' and the 'Pirates of The
Caribbean' sequels, among other projects, according to entertainment news
website TMZ.com.
Bloom left the company earlier this year and signed with rivals
Brillstein-Grey.
Copyright World Entertainment News Network 2005
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http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/showbiz/showbiznews.html?in_a
rticle_id=367175&in_page_id=1773
'It's hard to be perfect'
by ESTHER SWALES, Mail online
Kirsten Dunst, star of new romantic comedy Elizabethtown, is just as petite
and elfin face-to-face as she appears on screen. Dressed in red, with black
tights and shoes, her impossibly slim 5ft 7in frame is elegantly folded into
an armchair in London's Dorchester hotel suite.
Looking incredibly fresh the morning after she wowed the crowds of Leicester
Square at the London premiere of Elizabethtown, her face is framed by a
layered blonde fringe and bob, and her piercing blue eyes are smiley and
alert.
One of the main themes in the film revolves around being positive - and the
impact it has on success and love. But in reality, unlike her effervescent
onscreen character, she admits co-star Orlando Bloom was usually more upbeat
than she was.
"I try to be positive, but I wouldn't be human if I didn't have a bad day,"
she says. "But it's funny because Orlando is always really positive and
happy, but he was playing someone depressive. I was the one playing somebody
who was positive - which is exhausting after a while and really depressing!
So I found it actually very draining to be that kind of perfect person."
Kirsten hadn't worked with Orlando before, but soon discovered that he was a
"really great person". However despite admitting she "really does care for
him" she is quick to dispel any of the rumours in circulation about an
off-screen romance.
Often hitting the US showbiz columns with gossip about the latest twist and
turn in her on-off relationship with actor Jake Gyllenhaal, Kirsten says she
needs commitment in her relationships.
"I think I'm definitely a serial-monogamous type of girl, you know," she
admits. "I'm a relationship kind of person."
'I had a big crush'
But despite being in the enviable position of sharing intimate moments with
heartthrob Orlando, she doesn't rate him as the best on-screen kiss she's
had. So out of all of her leading men, who could it be? Tobey Maguire? Paul
Bettany?
"Actually my best kiss on screen wasn't any of them," she laughs.
"I had a big crush on Josh Hartnett when I was doing the Virgin Suicides, so
for me that was so nerve-wracking... it may not have been the best kiss, but
it was great because I actually had a crush on him."
She adds mischievously: "But they're all really great guys so I can't really
say!"
Kirsten is one of only a few child stars who've made their career on the big
screen beyond the age of 10. At the tender age of six she made her name in
Woody Allen's New York Stories, playing Mia Farrow's daughter, and later
went on to star in Interview With The Vampire alongside Tom Cruise and Brad
Pitt. With 45 films to her name by the age of 23, she isn't doing badly.
Most recently starring in Spider-Man and Mona Lisa Smile, Kirsten has tried
her hand at everything, from the fantasy of Jumanji to the drama of The
Cat's Meow and rom-com Wimbledon.
But despite her years of experience, she admits there is still much to learn
from older actresses such as Susan Sarandon, who plays Hollie Baylor, the
recently-widowed mother of Drew (Orlando Bloom).
"I definitely admire her. I admire her as a woman," Kirsten reveals.
"I didn't really work with her much on this film but I also worked with her
when I was younger on Little Women. I just love how she's not afraid to say
what's on her mind. And she's so sexy and really smart."
Kirsten is sparkly, smart, successful and adored by millions of fans. So
does she ever get starstruck?
"I think I would be if I met Joni Mitchell," she says. "I want to meet her
and I know I would be very stuttering.
"I met Charlotte Rampling last night - she's another person that I think
'I'm such a great fan of yours!' and then feel such a dork!"
She pauses and laughs. "But, it's better to be a dork than to be cool, I
guess!"
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http://www.sfexaminer.com/articles/2005/08/30//columnists/scoop/20050830_co0
1_scoop.txt
The truth Down Under
After months of speculation about the state of his relationship with "Blue
Crush" star Kate Bosworth, Orlando Bloom confirmed to IOL.com that he is,
indeed, dating the actress again. "She's such a talented actress. She's a
beautiful girl, a beautiful person and we are having such a great time
together," the site quoted Bloom as saying. Early this year, the couple
parted ways because their career obligations caused them to be separated for
long stretches of time. But since the paparazzi have caught Bloom and
Bosworth cavorting all over the globe this summer and they seem to be making
it work. "I went out to Australia to see Kate and she's doing an amazing
job," Bloom said.
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http://www.news.com.au/story/0,10117,16389937-36557,00.html
Singles Bloom online
From: Agence France-Presse From correspondents in New York
August 26, 2005
Most wanted ... Orlando Bloom ORLANDO Bloom and Jennifer Aniston are the
celebrities American singles would most like to stumble across in an online
chat room, according to a recent survey.
The Lord of the Rings star and the soon-to-be ex Mrs Brad Pitt topped a poll
of 2907 singles nationwide by one of the leading internet US dating
services, Date.com.
The company conducted the survey in the wake of the recent revelation by
Catwoman star Halle Berry that she enjoys using a pseudonym to chat with
strangers on online dating sites.
"If you suddenly discovered that the prospect you've spent the past two
months meeting in the chat room was really a celeb-in-disguise, who would
you want it to be?" the poll asked.
Aniston was the first choice female celebrity with 22.3 per cent of the
vote, while Bloom led the men's field with 22.6 per cent.
Fantastic Four star Jessica Alba was second to Aniston with 18.2 per cent,
just slightly above Berry who was third with 18 per cent.
Romantic comedy stalwart John Cusack grabbed 18.7 per cent of the vote as
the the second most-favoured male celebrity, ahead of Bourne Identity star
Matt Damon with 16 per cent.
- Celebrity Gossip
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